i'm scared.
i know it's the deep sense of insecurities that keeps clouding over me.
and i can't really get rid of it.

i guess time will tell.
time will just makes everything straight.

as i packed my room, i chanced upon a reading log i wrote in 2002, 6 years ago.

title: forget-me-not
author: Jan Charket
date returned: 22-01-02

• for the grandeur of life is born of defeat, for in overcoming all we make life complete.
• his favourite motto was "life is so short, don't spend it on things you don't want to."
• I have always felt that anything which happens in our lives is for a reason and if we learn just one thing from the experience it has not all been in vain.
• when you think about it, we never really stop learning and even if we learn only one small thing each day, we are achieving something.

feels good reading it.
helps me keep positive at least for the day :)

Genie zhuoZhuo wen xuan

Please come for the ticket distribution if you are free!!!

Actually it feels so great to be back to school, back in the picture, back in the loop.
there are not many things that have changed actually.
but somehow, i just feel there's so much for me to catch up with.
the minor changes compounds to something really big to me.

went back to ntu yesterday to bring my exchange friends around.
really really proud to introduce my school to them.
really really proud to introduce my sunny little island to them.
i'm so excited to walk around my school myself and look at the school at a completely different point of view.

if there is one thing i learnt from my trip,
it'll be to cherish everything you have around you,
even if it is insignificant,
because one day,
one fine day,
you may just lose everything and be too late to regret.

i cherish my memories and look forward to building even more wonderful memories!! =)

blogging is so dangerous.

i don't know who is reading what i'm writing right now.
i don't know why the person wants to read about my crap.
i don't know why people even wanna write publicly to expose their inner thoughts or their lives.

but anyhow,

i hope the people reading my blog can feel happier, more inspired, more motivated in life.
like that, i can feel more happy, inspired and motivated to write my little open diary.

anyway, i'm so excited my sister bought me a cute little diary from shanghai!!!!
this is a small little thing that accepts everything and anything from me.
my diary is personified!
=)

i'm back in singapore!!!

i would say, my long long journey back to singapore went well.
knew some great people along the way.
which certainly made a great impact in my life.

it's just remarkable how one can build trust and friendship within a day.
maybe we'll not meet up ever again.
but the times we spent together,
the ideas we shared with each other,
the support we provided for one another,
the care we showered upon one another,
all these are wonderful.
And they will forever be remembered.

and the friends i've met in netherlands.
they are one of the most incredible people i have ever seen.
it may be sad to say good byes.
but i'll always remember the happy times we had together.
and be glad that i once had them.

i miss my mcdreamy.
but now i'm glad.
i'm glad it puts a smile on my face as i look back.

christmas.
it's a festival for family and friends.
it's a festival to share all your joys and laughter together.
i'm happy i get to share this wonderful day with my beloved extended family members tomorrow.

enjoy.
and give thanks.

what does it take to be market-driven?
managers always fall into 3 traps...
1. self-centered trap
2. customer compulsion trap
3. skepticism trap...

these are so apt to even our lives....

ahh... so random...
life is so random...
i love the random things in life...
it makes things much interesting and colourful...

i can't sleep i can't sleep i can't sleep....

10 hrs to dooms day...

i still can't sleep still can't sleep still can't sleep...

9 hrs n 58 min to dooms day....

the thought of leaving this peaceful and beautiful place is really saddening...

2 more days...
just 2 more days, i'm going to leave this place

but as i think of my sweet abode,
my sisters,
my parents,
my xiao bai,
my bed,
my table,
my full-length mirror,
my ah gong,
i feel glad...
i feel happy....

i'm finally going back to where i truly belong.

i guess people just can't get the best of both worlds...

so i'm glad.
glad for this unforgettable experience.
an experience of a lifetime.

i've been living in my dreams for the past 4 months...

it has been sweet sometimes...
bitter at times...

but i can't deny, i enjoy it here...

the thought of leaving this beautiful, scenic dream makes my heart goes sour...

i'm going to miss maastricht so so much.

omg, i can't believe i grew an attachment for this place already.

more than a year ago...
i posted these...

1. Change is the only constant. Things change, people change, i change too...
2. Don't try to compare people. It makes things complicated.
3. Don't waste time thinking of what you have not done. Think of what you can do.
4. Don't go trying to please everybody. People have insatiable wants.
5. If you want somebody to be good to you, be better to that someone.
6. Ask and it shall be given.
7. All things happen for a reason. Accept it and move on.
8. Life is filled with choices. I choose to be happy.
9. We are not living in an utopia. Life is but a dream.
10. Liberation...

=)

i like to smile...

be it a sheepish smile,
be it a reassuring smile,
be it a nervous smile,
be it a happy smile,
be it a forced smile,

i use all types of smiles to express myself.

especially when all words seem redundant,
when all other actions seem worthless,
when everything else seems to not work right.

just smile.

even if it's a fake smile,
it'll help bring you through...

i still feel like a dog...
but i'm like a dog without an owner...

i don't want to be a dog...

i must learn to be a cat!

woke up suddenly...

all the harsh realities and bitter histories...

one i respect so much and revered all these while...
one that i love deeply and care with smiles...

u brought me up and nurtured me to what i've become.

yet, u gave me so much disappointments and bring so much pain to my loved ones.

please stay happy and be happy.

i'll continue to trust and believe in you.
and protect my closest loved ones.

thanks for pampering me through my germinating years.
you will always be in my heart.

Bangkok airport resumes operation.

=)

if they matter, they don't mind.

if they mind, they don't matter.

i realise these days i like to whine a lot...

remind me not to ok?

the most courageous thing one can do is to admit your mistake,
be it small or big.

small lies or omissions never bring anyone good.

don't ever push blame to others.

that's evil.

heroes are not those that save people from fire.
but the ones that face the music and accept criticisms.

be brave!

i absolutely adore this song!!!!

and don't you think joshua and kathy are absolutely gorgeous!!!!



anyway, i fell in love with this couple as they danced too!
i just feel them....

chelsea and mark :)